Ding Dong

A signal for simplicity

After wrapping a year-long TV show in San Diego that was fraught with drama, I was exhausted. It had been a grueling marathon and once home in LA, I think I slept for a whole week. Refreshed and back in the land of the living, I finally had time to catch up with friends I’d not seen in forever.

I really needed a change from movie-talk, so one of the first people I hooked up with was my friend Leslie, a therapist who had a client roster of Hollywood film industry women who were plagued by overthinking, self-doubt, and endless questioning of their decisions.

Familiar territory in LA and elsewhere…

The last time we were together was during awards season when she’d been feeling overwhelmed by how many of her female clients with nominated films were challenged this way, and was depressed by her lack of success in getting through to them.

Now, almost a year later, Leslie was practically glowing with excitement over a conversation she’d had recently with a colleague who’d identified a means of cutting through the bullshit in a way she had never even thought about before.

Her colleague had talked about how children’s minds work, unconsciously going for the most simple, obvious solution and bypassing all the overthinking and self-doubting and questioning that are hallmarks of what goes on in adult minds.

The guy told her about a hypothetical question he’d asked some of the women and children he worked with, along with their responses. It was extremely revealing, incredibly simple, and for Leslie, it landed with a soul-shaking thud.


What’s the first thing you’d open if unexpected guests rang your doorbell?


Here’s what the women did -

I could open that pot of caviar left over from the party...
I could open that box of artisanal crackers I bought last week...
I could open that bottle of chianti I put aside for a special occasion...
I could open that jar of fig jam to go with some brie I have in the fridge...

Or there’s that packet of Serrano ham we bought in Spain...
I could always break out the box of chocolate truffles...
Maybe I should just grab that bag of potato chips...
I’m pretty sure I have a big can of mixed nuts... 


Here’s what the kids did -

I'd open the door and let them in!


I thought about the significance of simplicity, immediacy, and decisiveness versus overthinking, doubting, and questioning the whole drive home, caught in bumper-to-bumper LA rush hour traffic.

It wasn’t until I was sitting on my back porch as the sun set that I finally got that the TV show had been such a draining dramarama because I’d forsaken simplicity in my unconscious quest for complexity.

And since then, whenever I find myself veering toward indecision or overthinking, I hear the words Ding Dong in my mind and know it's a signal to keep things simple 🧿